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Joke of the Day

"I had to quit my job as a Microsoft delivery man It got awkward telling people I was giving word to their mother."

"Just ran 45 minutes on the treadmill and burned 732 calories. Or as many people like to call it, 4 olives."

"A man goes to a psychiatrist ""Doctor, I don't know what to do. My wife thinks she's a piano."" Doctor says ""Well, bring her in."" ""Are you *nuts*? Do you know what it costs to move a piano?"""

"Note down the number please. A person was riding on a horse, He Jumped the red light, a cop whistles' person lifts the tail of horse and says, ""Note down the number please."""

"Why did the shark go to the doctors? Because he didn't feel very whale"

"Cigarettes only give you cancer if you let them. It's called science. Maybe you'd know more about it if you read as many Yahoo Answers as me"

"Why is this election historic? It's the first time we're guaranteed there'll be a cunt in the oval office."

"What do you call it when Charlie Sheen's brother has sex with him? Emilio Incestevez"

"Why i love redheads? Because if roof is rusty it's always wet in basement."

"A man with anxiety accidentally annoyed the cartel He began seeing a psychiatrist because of hispanic attacks."