115659

Joke of the Day

"Avocados are like women: soft inside, dinosaur skin outside, big cricket ball in the middle, all the good ones are taken..."

"why dont women drive? because theres not road from the bed room to the kitchen"

"How do the fish get to school ? By octobus !"

"I cried last night harder than I've ever cried before. I really should invest in a nose hair trimmer instead of plucking them."

"Who does the butcher look forward to seeing after a tough day at work? His loving knife."

"If you see a woman holding Fifty Shades of Grey, smile and say ""congratulations on your first book!"""

"My favorite rapper is 50 cent Or as the British people now call him, 10,000 pounds."

"Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book? They all have phones."

"Watching Avatar again Didn't notice the first time how odd it was that all the Na'vi were portrayed as so pale-skinned and blonde..."

"Doctor: ""Sir, the results are in. I'm afraid you have a serious case of 80s Rock Bands Alzheimer's"" Patient: ""Oh my god. What is the cure??!"""