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Joke of the Day
"How do the fish get to school ? By octobus !"
Next Joke
"What's the best thing to bring to your holiday party? A Christmas tree. Because they're lit."
"""You run like you're making fun of running."" -my brother"
"There are three people in this world... Those who can count, and those you can not."
"Two dyslexics run into a bank... and they shout ""Air in the hands mother stickers, this is a fuck up!"""
"Doctor: Are you on any antidepressants? Me: You mean like nachos? Yes."
"If ever you're feeling down, and I can't be there to do it in person, just imagine me awkwardly patting your shoulder & looking at my watch."
"What animal do you get when shake a pig? a ham-stir"
"Whats long and black? The unemployment line"
"People always look at me weird when I argue with my food, but what can I say? I cook a mean steak."