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Joke of the Day

"You can tell a movie is going to be funny if one is the characters is shrugging in the poster. Because shrugging people will do anything!"

"When I die, I'd like the word Humble' to be written. .......on my statue."

"What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause."

"Our topic today: Should we legalize monster trucks? We'll speak to monster truck expert Kevin, age 8. He believes they are ""cool and big."""

"How much does a birdhouse cost? I don't know the exact price but I know they're pretty cheep"

"What do you call a dinosaur that's in a hurry? A Prontosaur."

"What did the agnostic, dyslexic insomniac do? Lay awake in bed wondering if there really is a dog."

"Dark Humour Dark humour is not everyone's cup of liquidised dead baby"

"Why I'm leaving /r/jokes I have to go to work. I'll be back later."

"Did you know that all Bicyclists are colorblind? Cause they can't tell Green from Red!"