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Joke of the Day

"A group of people were yelling at me in the movie theater. It got so loud I had to take my phone call outside."

"Which color confuses an idiot? Blue"

"What do you say to a Jewish New Zealander? Hee brew"

"I hate it when people ask me where I see myself in 5 years. Come on man, I don't have 2020 vision!"

"What was 2016? The best joke I've ever heard!"

"Names of Groups A group of crows is called a 'Murder' of crows. A group of cats is called a 'Glaring' of cats. What do you call a group of Lexus cars? A fortune!"

"Paris Hilton's IMDB page should only be accessible on April 1st."

"Who was the knight that invented the round table? Sir Cumference. (via friend who got this from a street performance group in the England area of Epcot)"

"My doctor told me if I was 5"" taller I'd be at the ideal weight, so I'm going to try and give that a shot."

"What's the best thing about duct tape? It turns no, no, no into Mm, Mm, Mmmm"