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Joke of the Day

"I've been putting my sunglasses on and walking away from things in slow motion all day, nothing has exploded yet."

"I met a hot girl. We had dinner yesterday. At least I'm assuming she had dinner."

"When is the earliest time of day Nintendo fans play games? The Wii hours of the morning."

"I live next door to a hacker. I wish he'd cut back on smoking."

"39 and 41 had a fight. 42. ... 41."

"What does Vin Diesel call ""pin the tail on the donkey""? Fasten the furry ass."

"A stupid knock knock joke Knock knock! Who's there? Europe. Europe Who? No you're a poo!"

"I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it."

"What do you get when you have an ant with 8 legs? An uncle that has to build a bigger shoe closet..."

"There are only a few people I can say ""You're one of the few friends I enjoy being with more in person than on Facebook."