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Joke of the Day
"Yo mamma's so fat... The reserve bank bailed her out, cause she was too big to fail."
Next Joke
"Named my band Scheduled for Demolition so whenever it appears on a marquee, confused people write angry letters to the city council."
"Which snakes are found on cars? Windscreen vipers."
"Why doesn't Santa give gifts to naughty kids? Because it'd Krampus style."
"Why does it take 2 feminists to screw in a lightbulb? One to screw in the lightbulb and one to give me a blow job while I supervise."
"Favorite cannibal movies: 3) Cannibal Holocaust 2) Cannibal Ferox 1) She's Having a Baby"
"Hey, hip hop artists. Would it kill you to throw in a few rhymes about raisin toast or farmers' markets?"
"MTV stopped having their ""Unplugged"" specials because the shitty artists we have now can't play any instruments."
"RETIRED STUNTMAN: We didn't have fancy CGI. If the script said to drive a truck into a dinosaur, we drove a truck into a goddamn dinosaur."
"No no, I'm not going to pay for these hot wings, I discovered them and you JUST GOT COLUMBUSED"