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Joke of the Day

"What does Santa say when he is sick? OH OH NO!"

"How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb? One. One to change it and his girlfriend to give him a blowjob when he's done."

"What happens when you give a cow a joint? The steaks are high"

"Steven hawking is setting a bad example for kids these days... Being on his computer all day"

"Why did the chicken cross the road twice? Because it was a double-crosser"

"I bought these shoes from a drug dealer I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day."

"The Names of Politicians Bush... Dick... Boehner... Weiner... And they say politicians sometimes win via *name recognition*."

"My coworker is pregnant and they passed a card around and I didn't know what to write so I just put HAVE A GOOD BABY TANYA"

"*nervously adjusts fedora in Starbucks lineup I'll have uh, um, a mediu- I mean vanti, uh, mochacachito? Patrons: HE'S A FRAUD! GET HIM!!!"

"Hey guy that puts the stickers on tomatoes, nobody likes you."