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Joke of the Day

"Felt like my car was going to blow over from this wind today. I feel bad for the smart cars that are probably stuck in trees."

Next Joke
 
"Waiting to see who sits next to you on a plane feels like the opposite of winning the lottery."
"Why did Clemson choose orange as its team color? So they could play football on Saturday, go hunting on Sunday, and pick up garbage the rest of the week."
"My friend started a business in Afghanistan selling land mines that look like prayer rugs.. He says prophets are going through the roof."
"A man shot a guy in the butt from 1000m away It was one helluva crack-shot."
"Whats invisible and smells like carrots? bunny farts"
"I once knew a women who started walking five miles a day when she turned 60... . Well, she's 99 now and we have no idea where she is."
"*opens fortune cookie* there's rice on your face *grabs wifes and opens it* still there *grabs one from next table* I can do this all night"
"Got a problem with me? I'm pretty sure a status on Facebook won't fix it."
"*horse walks into a bar* *horse walks into a bar* *horse walks into a bar* *horse walks into an optometrist* Horse: Holy shit please help me"