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Joke of the Day

"If electricity takes the path of least resistance... why doesn't lightning only strike the country of France?"

"A guy walks into a bar... Alcoholism is slowly destroying his family."

"Went into Dollar Store. Asked for a dollar. Cashier did not give me one. Suing company for false advertising."

"What's big, green and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table"

"Bill Cosby awarded another honorary degree from Boston University, this time is was Anesthesiology."

"I think what irritates me most about Katy Perry is that I thought she was a Zooey Deschanel SNL character until about 2 months ago."

"How do you get people to quit smoking? Cut off their lips"

"My friend works at the morgue and apparently tonight is open mike night."

"When I see.... ...lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."

"What do you call violence in the kitchen? Assault and pepper"