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Joke of the Day

"So, Burt and Ernie are just sitting at home, when Burt looks over at Ernie and asks, ""Hey Ernie, do you want to get some ice cream?"" Then Ernie said, ""Sure Burt."""

"You know how I found out I have a fruit fetish? I had an Orange Crush."

"What does my cat and Donald Trump have in common? Neither of them pay taxes"

"What's the longest sentence in the English language? I do."

"A guy walks into a bar the punchline doesn't matter because the real joke is always in the comments."

"I'm so sleepy I feel like I can sleep through to next year"

"I feel sorry for people who sell magazines. Seems like they got a lot of issues."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cash ! Cash who ? Cash me if you can !"

"My dentist offered to give me dentures for only a dollar. It sounded like a good deal at the time, but now I have buck teeth."

"Have you heard the Eric Garner joke? It's so funny I can't breathe Edit: Woah gold, thank you kind stranger :D"