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Joke of the Day
"The inventor of the throat lozenge has died. There will be no coffin at his funeral."
Next Joke
"Why did the vampire pull out? He needed permission to come inside."
"DISH FATHER: You can NEVER see that spoon again! *daughter dish starts sobbing* [outside the window, Spoon is thinking] we leave tonight"
"Bush Senior broke his neck He was trying to show Jeb Bush how to dodge wrenches, hey Jeb if George can dog a shoe then I can dog wrench!"
"Someone just called for cleanup in the dairy aisle but I'm the only one here so I dropped the jug of milk I was holding and ran"
"If you call someone from Alaska an Alaskan, someone from Texas a Texan, and Iowa an Iowan; what do you call someone from Utah? A Mormon"
"Q: What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common? A: They're both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're dead."
"Protestant joke Q: How many Protestants does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they live in eternal darkness."
"911: what's your emergency? me: I taught my Dad how to text 911: the problem ma'am? me: he CALLS to say ""yeah, got ur text"""
"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair ? Virgin Mobile"