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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when you grind your teeth because you are bugged you forgot your dental floss? Flossless compression!"

"In Catholicism, souls have mass."

"What do you call a reptiloid that crashed landed its spaceship? Imsosaurus!"

"Getting gilded is like losing your virginity I have yet to experience it... Edit: Thank you, abcriminal, for the gold. It was a worthy experience."

"Why do historians say Hitler was a great mathematician? He could always find the final solution"

"Why does a d dog scratch himself? He is the only one that knows where it itches."

"I'm sick of these people turning up at my door, telling me they're my saviours and if I don't listen I'll burn. Fucking firemen."

"What kind of cheese do you use to entice a bear down from a tree? Camembert!"

"Heard a 28yr old describe herself as old. Need help disposing of a body."

"What is a horse being when it says mean thinga It's being neigh-gitive! Edit: Awesome. Screwed up the title"