111452

Joke of the Day

"Why weren't the eggplants allowed into the mushroom party? Because there wasn't much room and they aren't fun guys."

"BOSS: Ok so far so good. But before we finish the interview I'm gonna have you take a typing test. LOBSTER: *looking down at claws* Shit"

"I bought some super sensitive condoms a few months ago and they won't stop crying because I don't use them."

"Ever hear about the box that was coming down with something? It was coffin"

"Did you hear that Napoleon broke the Sphinx's nose with a singe shot? It was a one-hit wonder. I'll show myself out."

"What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him? Nothing. He just let out a little wine."

"What do you call Rihanna if she gets fat? A Rihanna Grande"

"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair Virgin Mobile"

"Can everyone start saying salad is really bad for me so I can start craving it?"

"How many animals can fit into a pair of pantyhose? Ten pigs, two calves, one beaver, and an ass."