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Joke of the Day

"I bought some ""no more tears"" shampoo but her hair still tore right out!"

"How I knew my GF was playing with herself on her period... I caught her red-handed."

"Q: Why do blondes drive BMWs? A1: Because they can spell it. A2: Because they can spell BWM."

"Have you ever smelled moth balls? Yes? How'd you get their little legs apart? (Courtesy of my dad. Who laughed about this for 30 minutes.)"

"First ghoul: You don't look too well today. Second ghoul: No I'm dead on my feet."

"2 grams for $40??? Son, you are getting soooooo ripped off. Go see Jermaine on Fremont St. Tell him Your Mother sent you."

"I was playing guitar then my 2 year old took my guitar pick and dropped it somewhere. ""Where is my pick,"" I said. He replied ""Oink Oink! "" I repeated the question but got the same answer every time."

"How amphetamine addiction is called? Need for Speed."

"What do you get when you cross an insomniac, dyslexic, and agnostic? Someone who stays up wondering if there is a dog."

"What do you get if you cross an illiterate african american with an illegal hispanic immigrant looking for a green card? A U.S soldier."