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Joke of the Day

"I'll always remember what my dad said right before he bought the farm. How much does this farm cost?"

"What do you call it when you punch someone with an avocado? Guacamelee"

"If you ask me what my favorite rock band is and I'm being subjective, I'd say The Who. If I was being objective, I'd say it was The Whom."

"What does an Indian man get when he works out? Sikh gains. I made this up too! Although this joke has probably been said before"

"I wonder if this conversation ever took place.. - Jesus, what is that over there? - Don't hang me up on it, but I think it's a cross."

"Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week what have you got to say about that? Pupil: Thank heavens it's Friday !"

"My girlfriend texted me ""helpmyspacebarbrokecanyoucomeoverandgivemeanalternative"" Anybody know what ""ternative"" means?"

"Aerosmith guitarist Joe Perry was *rear ended* this morning. Now I understand why he Walks This Way."

"What does a british man say when he's about to climax? I'm arriving"

"Why is it everything I love is either unhealthy, addicting or has multiple restraining orders against me?"