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Joke of the Day

"""I'd like two scoops of ice cream, please."" ""Chocolate or vanilla?"" ""Yes."" ""Yes what?"" ""Yes, Sir, ice cream man, Sir!"""

Next Joke
 
"Three men walk into a bar, what's missing? The joke! Usually one would introduce this one with: ""I'm gonna tell you a joke"" - but since we are in /r/jokes here, the setup should be ok."
"So, this co-worker stated that she makes ice cubes with her leftover alcohol. I'm confused. What's leftover alcohol?"
"Can't decide whether to go to bed or to finish this Rubik's cube I started in 1988."
"A ghost walks into a bar ""Sorry sir"" the barmen says, ""We don't serve spirits after eleven"""
"How do you get certified as an interior decorator? You don't pull out"
"How do dinosaurs smell? Ex-stinky"
"YOU: I murdered someone. YOUR DOG: I'm totally cool with that. I love you. ****************** YOU: I murdered someone. YOUR CAT: Me too."
"Tim Cook: ""We're excited to annou-"" #Apple fans: ""We'll buy it."" Tim Cook: ""Let me fini-"" Apple fans: ""We'll buy that too."" #iPhone6"
"No, I don't need a Fitbit. I can count to 45 by myself."
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