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Joke of the Day

"Somebody at work brought donuts this morning and I didn't eat one which is great but I'm still thinking about them"

"What goes CLOP CLOP CLOP, BANG BANG, CLOP CLOP CLOP? An Amish drive-by shooting"

"A haunted house would be pretty scary if it was filled with light switches that accidentally turned on the garbage disposal."

"Me: If I have $45 and your mother has $15, how much money does your mom have? 6yo: $60 Me: That's correct, son."

"How to make holy water You boil the hell out of it."

"New lesbian species of dinosaur discovered. Lickalottapus."

"What is better than Roses on a Piano? Tulips on an Organ."

"Knock knock*** Who's there? Ask me a predictable question. Ask me a predictable question who? Okay. Very good. Thank you for your cooperation. You are very welcome."

"Judge threw out a lawsuit against Starbucks said the Plaintiff had no grounds."

"What do you get... ... when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic, and and agnostic? [Answer](/s ""Someone who lays awake all night wondering if there really is a dog"")"