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Joke of the Day

"I popped into Tesco last night to get some oxo cubes but couldn't see any on the shelf, they must be out of stock!"

"A terrorist invites his socially awkward friend to a party ""C'mon,"" he said, ""It'll be a blast."""

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Baloney ! Baloney who ? Baloney chase you if you're a matador !"

"What do you call 1,000 liberals at the bottom of the ocean? A good start! **an old joke that my dad used to tell at every party. You could replace ""liberals"" with pretty much anything."

"Losing weight to be attractive is weird. I see you shrunk your body slightly. Now I want you."

"Have you heard the one about the deaf guy? He hasn't either."

"What kind of workout does Bob the electrician do? Circuit training."

"Are we heading in the right direction, Yoda? - ""Off-course we are"""

"Man: Lima is a capital city in South America. Woman: Peru-ve it!"

"Two peanuts are walking down the street... one's assaulted."