107601

Joke of the Day

"After the American Revolution, Thomas Paine celebrates by purchasing a new pair of shoes. He declares that these are the times to try men's soles."

"In the old days you could send your kid to the store with a note to get your cigarettes. Now they need a mask and a knife."

"A racist joke What is the difference between a pizza and a black guy? A pizza can feed a family of four."

"My doctor said I needed to reduce stress. Great, now I have that to worry about."

"What makes a barbershop quartet sound so amazing? They're on the cutting edge of musical innovation."

"I just said ""bye - bye"" when I ended a phone call, and now I'm debating on if I should have my milk & cookies before or after recess."

"What does a bartender give you when you need the feeling of a strong drink, but you're not allowed ton consume alcohol? Xanax since he's a Bartender"

"at library ME: This book wasn't helpful at all! LIBRARIAN: Why? What's the problem? BIRD: [mockingly] ""Why? What's the problem?"""

"A cheese factory in France exploded. All that was left was debris."

"""Why?"" - Socrates and four year-olds"