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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the new nightclub that opened called ""Erectile Dysfunction""? No? I'm not surprised; it was a complete flop. Nobody came."

"""Damn do you have a wizard wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? ;)"" *pulls wand from pocket* ""I haven't been happy in years"""

"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup Everyone can roast beef"

"The FDA is banning trans fats because they're bad for you... but OJ has actually killed people!"

"What do you get when you cross a JOKE with a RHETORICAL QUESTION?"

"The only way to protect ourselves from eagle attacks is of course MORE eagles. Fill our homes with these gentle, knife clawed birds of prey."

"My preferred method of birth control is ""mood-killing repetitive DVD menu."""

"What do you get when you squeeze a synagogue? Jews."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa."

"Why did the polar bear join the terrorist group. Because that is where the ISIS."