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Joke of the Day

"Hubby's head seems like it's almost twice the size of mine. We are never having children."

"I think my Waffle House waitress moonlights with AT&T; because I'm getting absolutely no service."

"What do you call a turkey with no arms? a turkey"

"When I met you I was completely blown away because the wind was ridiculous."

"So I was eating out my Grandma... ...And I tasted horse semen and thought, *Ohh, so that's how she died.*"

"One lady to another, Do you talk to your husband during sex ? Yes, if he calls on my cell."

"A good friend doesn't just make you smile, they make you happy."

"Hey, maybe one time we could make a sitcom where the husband is out of the wife's league and the wife says stupid shit all the time."

"I Like Long Walks on the Beach until the LSD wears off and it turns out I'm dragging a mannequin around a Wendy's parking lot"

"What did one lesbian vampire say to the other?"