106831

Joke of the Day

"I like my women like I like my wine... 7 years old and locked up in a cellar"

"What do Jews get at night during the holocaust? Not z's"

"I have a deeply religious Muslim friend who knows the Qu'ran back to front Which is the way that the Koran is written. A surprisingly well informed joke about Islam (with apologies to Jimmy Carr)."

"What's the difference between a golfer and a climber? A golfer goes whack......shit. A climber goes shit.......whack."

"What did the old billy bobs eat at McDonald's? McChicken-killer... Yeah I'm really stoned smoked a chicken killer and ate McDonald's"

"I woke up this morning to find Gloria Gaynor at the foot of my bed. At first I was afraid...I was petrified."

"Everybody thinks I am a psychopath... but I don't care what they think."

"Guys, I don't think we should drink so much yesterday."

"There are two reasons I don't give money to the homeless 1. They use it for drugs and alcohol. 2. I need it for drugs and alcohol."

"What noise does a nut make when it has a cold? ... CASHEWW!"