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Joke of the Day
"What do Sarah Palin and Iron Man have in common? ...they've both had a Downey Jr. inside them."
Next Joke
"What do you call an atheist who no longer worships the Flying Spaghetti Monster? A-pasta-ate."
"What's one advantage of electing a woman president of the United States? We wouldn't have to pay her as much."
"2 monkeys in the bath. One says to the other... ""Ooh ah ah ah uh uh ooh ah ah ah ah aaah"" The other says... ""Do you want me to put some more cold in?"""
"It's scary to think that people like you are graduating from college."
"Kayne West Knocked Up Kim Kardashian No punchline needed."
"Thanks for being the shoulder to put my head on.. Though being a conjoined twin does have its cons."
"Did you hear about the Buddhist that refused Novocaine during his root canal? He wanted to transcend dental medication..."
"TL; DR: Action hero references Oedipus Die Hard's John McClane and his catchphrase . . ."
"""I hope she got fat, I hope she got fat"" - me looking up an ex girlfriend on Facebook."