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Joke of the Day

"Women like to claim that they are equal to men... Women like to claim that they are equal to men, but women have never successfully oppressed and entire gender."

"what's the difference between time and ronaldo? time passes"

"Men have a basic understanding of complex ideas. Women have a complex understanding of basic ideas."

"Some days, I wish I were robosexual, because if I was into bots, I would have all the luck on Tinder."

"JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL! *Car crashes*"

"Billy has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. Billy has diabetes."

"I'm gonna get a neck tattoo that looks exactly like my neck."

"Chuck Norris was once on Jeopardy. This show is notable in that it was the first occasion in Jeopardy history that Alex Trebek had appeared without a mustache. And a head."

"I treat my wife like a fine wine. I keep that bitch locked in the cellar."

"A three hour long movie adaptation of pages 74 and 75 of the Hobbit? Friggin count me in."