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Joke of the Day

"Everyone can stop painting. We all have cameras that can take perfect pictures of everything."

"Recently found out I'm not the devil. I read the tag on my underpants incorrectly; it said ""Satin"". Oops."

"What's a communist's favourite beverage? Leninade"

"What do bad dancers have in common with Michael J Fox trying to use the soft serve ice cream machine? They both have a hard time pulling off a twist."

"What's the difference between a Jewish mother and a terrorist? You can negotiate with terrorists."

"If women would start naming their periods like hurricanes it would be alot easier for us men to remember which argument you are referring to."

"What is a seal's favorite drink? Club soda"

"A pig, trying to save its life. After seeing a grill in the garden, the pig started to bark at strangers!"

"What do gym junkies and Nicki Minaj have in common? They both inject a lot of cash into their ass."

"To those out there who have accused me of selling out, of abandoning my beliefs and values to climb the social ladder: uh... yeah. yes."