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Joke of the Day

"Our boss just banned overly specific nicknames and the whole office is staring at Rat Snitch Brian The Good Time Ruiner."

"Frankenstein the Gardner why is frankenstein a great gardner????"

"Why did the horny furry get arrested? Because he was a sexual predator."

"My sons consider ""it's bedtime"" my first offer in the negotiation process"

"What's the difference between a bowling ball and a French girl? You can only fit three fingers in a bowling ball."

"The installers put down my new hardwood really quickly. They floored it. (Was the reply when I told a friend that the installers were almost done)"

"My girlfriend just texted me ""myspacebarisbrokencanyougivemeanalternative?"" Does anyone know what ""ternative"" means?"

"Teach a man to fish and he will evolve to become so skilled at it that he destroys the ocean and kills every last fish. Nice one education."

"*empties an ice cube tray in the Arctic* ""You're free now."""

"What are cranes made of? Cranium."