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Joke of the Day

"How do you tell your girlfriend is getting fat? She fits in your wife's clothes"

"What's the difference between a pizza and a baby I won't rape the pizza before I put it in the oven"

"I like Ouija boards It's the only game I can still play with grandma."

"(NSFW) What did the haddock get covered in at the fish orgy? SALMONal fluid"

"An Egg and a Chicken were having sex... But which came first? - Took this title from someone but changed the punchline."

"If a bunch of white people running down a hill is an avalanche, what is a bunch of black people running down a hill? A prison break."

"Twitter's new ""local"" feature tells me that ""goodmorning"" and ""nowthatsghetto"" are trending here in Washington. Wow. This is a game-changer."

"How do you know if your sister is on her period? Your dad's dick would taste like blood"

"If I was a waiter & asked if the customer was done eating & they said no, I would say 'fat fuck'. Then draw a hippopotamus on their check."

"What do you call 3 Irish tree surgeons? Tree fellas"