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Joke of the Day

"Hooker What did the guy say to the hooker after he was finished? Well I'm going to leave it with you!"

"If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it... A hipster bought the soundtrack."

"That'll do it! How do you kill a vegetarian vampire? You stab him with a steak to the heart."

"The real danger of running with scissors is that a rock might fall on you."

"Why I don't let my girlfriend play my PS4. 1. I don't have a PS4. 2. I don't have a girlfriend."

"Have you guys heard about the new store called moderation? *They have everything there!*"

"I got peanut butter on my camera Now every picture is a jif"

"heres a bad joke your life"

"I was woken on the plane by a panicky stewardess That's how i lost my job as a pilot."

"What do a pizza delivery boy and a gynecologist have in common? Always have to smell it, never get to eat it."