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Joke of the Day

"Some terrorists are flying over France, what do they do? They go parachuting."

"People Magazine sounds like something aliens pretending to be humans would call their magazine."

"Bad News I heard that the Italian Government is joining forces with ISIS thus changing their name to Italian ISIS Tommy G"

"Signs that your wife is cheating on you: 1. Wearing more makeup and perfume than usual 2. Acting distant 3. Sleeping with another dude"

"What vegetable likes to party? A turn-up"

"COP: We have reports of u blasting music. ME: Sorry I'll keep the Metallica down COP: We were told it was Britney Spears ""Lucky."" On repeat."

"What did transferred epithet tell hyperbole? Calm your tits, bro"

"What do you call a man with no arms or legs who likes to go swimming? Bob."

"If Trump gets elected... ...it will be the first time in History that a billionaire moves into public housing vacated by a black family."

"i started carrying a knife on me after an attempted mugging three years ago. since then, my mugging attempts have been much more successful."