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Joke of the Day

"Doesn't take a rocket scientist to understand A neutron walks into a bar, and asks: ""How much for a drink?"". To which the bartender replies: ""For you, no charge"""

"Do you want to hear a dirty, heavy, wet joke? Elephant in the mud. I'll see myself out."

"Alien: we are here to enslave you Me: *not looking up from phone* huh? Alien: I SAID.. Me: *still not looking up* yeah I said I'll do it"

"What's the difference between an epileptic oyster and a prostitute with diarrhoea? One shucks between fits..."

"Why did the walrus goto the tupperware party? He was looking for a tight seal."

"Someone tried to sell me a coffin today. I told him that's the last thing I need."

"Chuck Norris can win a game of chess in only one move...... a roundhouse kick to the face."

"The new Batman movie wasn't all that good I know 12 people that won't watch it again"

"Lee was born without legs, but he was incredibly determined to finish the triathlon. Slow Lee but sure Lee."

"No one ever mentions the 1000 miles of trouble free luxury cruising before the iceberg....."