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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the famous nudist? He wanted more exposure."

"My wife Googled ""how responsible does a 10yr old need to be to stay at home without a babysitter"" and now she won't let me stay home alone."

"How many potatoes does it take to kill a Latvian? None."

"Teacher: Why are you late? Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? Student: No. I was standing on it."

"I unveiled my plan for loan repayments. It's staggering."

"Me: I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse. Him: Ma'am, for the last time, we don't have a limit on how much liquor you can buy."

"Why do girls wear makeup and perfume ? Because they are ugly and they stink !"

"When I awoke from the car accident in a full bodycast, my wife was right at my bedside to let me know that childbirth is still more painful."

"Hey guys where do Chemists come from? ... From the *Stork*iometry. I'll see myself out now."

"A blonde's boyfriend dies after choking She tried calling 911 but couldn't find the eleven."