103589
Joke of the Day
"Just realized what I'm putting on my tombstone. If you're reading this, I'm already dead."
Next Joke
"I got really excited when she talked about a motorboat date, but as it turns out, she just wanted to take a ride on the lake. *sigh*"
"In honor of Cinco De Mayo - Why do Mexicans cross the border two at a time? Because the signs say ""No Trespassing""."
"What is a firewalker's favorite snack? Tostitos."
"The internet is just another location for people to be wrong about things."
"My OCD brings all the boys to the yard, where they're sanitized and counted before I wash my hands of them."
"silly joke If you think, what you better than other people, your ass must be ready for big problems"
"Boss: this project is moving along at a snail's pace!! *silence* Todd the snail: This is bullshit *spends 3hrs storming out of meeting*"
"THE WEEKND: I can't feel my face when I'm with you DENTIST (injecting novocaine): that's kinda the point dude"
"A man goes to a doctor. The doctor examines him and finds out he has five penises. The doctor says, ""That's amazing! How do your pants fit?"" The man says, ""Like a glove."""