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Joke of the Day

"Phone Women are like IPhones, you have to touch them all over before they respond! Men are like Blackberrys, rub one ball and everything moves!"

"Lif... ...is too short."

"A pharmaceutical company in Canada is offering $47 billion to buy the company that makes Botox. People at Botox were pretty excited I mean, you should've seen the look that wasn't on their faces."

"How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!"

"Did you know people are getting paid to mention products in their Facebook statuses? That's as crazy as the discounts at Dave's Furniture Emporium..."

"Like every good global citizen I've reduced my power consumption by 50% by running all my power off the neighbours while they're on vacation"

"According to Facebook, 78% of girls I went to high school with now own their own photography business."

"If Psy has a kid Does that mean he does it broken condom style? I'll just show myself out."

"A rap song where I'm just telling my dog about my day & I keep rhyming with ""treats"" so he stays interested."

"Why did God create women? To carry semen from the bedroom to the toilet."