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Joke of the Day

"Video games should be banned. My son just threw a turtle shell at a walking mushroom then disappeared down a green tube. Someone call 911."

"what do you call a gay dinosaur? megasoreass"

"That awkward moment... ...when the woman you're dancing behind bends over so you can grind it, then you realise she just lost an earring...and that no one else in Starbucks can hear your iPod."

"Barkeep. Send a drink over to little ms. thang over there. Tell her it's from me Sir, that's a Ms. Pac-Man machine *raises glass, winks*"

"I always like to tell fart jokes about myself I call it self defecating humour"

"Why did Jimmy drop his icecream? He got hit by a bus!"

"I'd rather break your headboard than your heart."

"So my math teacher asked what I did over Thanksgiving... (-1)/8"

"Having a child with down syndrome really is the best deal. You buy 46 chromosomes, and get one free."

"Most embarrassing thing a human being can experience is publicly unrequited love. Second is having the noisy grocery cart."