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Joke of the Day

"Why can't you have multi-story buildings in China? That would be wong on so many levels!"

"My mom just put a pic on Facebook that says, ""Share if your daughter is beautiful AND smart."" She tagged my sister."

"2 hours into dieting] omg I'm so lightheaded"

"These tweets are a lot better if you imagine them being read by Morgan Freeman."

"Waiter: What dressing would you like on your salad? Me: Ice cream"

"what sign on your phone does a dog hate the most The pound sign."

"Do you want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it's too cheesy..."

"I can tell everything I need to know about your business by the thickness of your bathroom toilet paper."

"95% of the world is retarded I'm glad I am the 10%"

"It's hard for me to believe that the new Star Wars trailer has already been seen millions of times. How do they even know where it's parked?"