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Joke of the Day
"Why was the algebra teacher arrested on drug charges? He was caught doing lines of math!"
Next Joke
"my lawyer wants me to turn myself into the police but I keep telling him impersonating a cop is what got me into trouble in the first place"
"What starts with e, ends with e, and only contains one letter? an Envelope EDIT: My deepest Canadian apologies to those who are calling this a riddle. I always took it as a cheesy joke"
"To prepare her for real life I make my daughter pretend to tweet on a toy phone when she's taking a crap."
"Two atoms walk into a bar. The first one turns to the other and says ""I think I've lost an electron!"" The second one goes ""Are you sure?"" To which the first one replies ""I'm positive."""
"my cornflakes bring all the boys to my yard & theyre like this cereals hard damn right my cereals hard u should add milk so its not so sharp"
"What building has the most stories? A library."
"Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day? Sure, they're very scent-imental! "
"Crazy Ex girlfriends are like a box of chocolates They will kill your dog"
"When someone asks ""You know what I think?"", I say ""Yes I do"". End of discussion."