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Joke of the Day

"It would be a fun surprise if Jay-Z said he finished laying down some tracks and when you went outside there was a railroad."

"I renamed my toilet form John to Jim the other day- -that way, I can tell people that I wake up and go to the Jim every morning."

"What's the definition of a good actor? Somebody who tries hard to be everybody but himself."

"The rotation of the earth. Really makes my day."

"Thought I saw a brownie walk by but it was just my dog. Other than that, diet is going well."

"A: What are you doing? B: Nothing A: Didn't you do that yesterday? B: I havent finished..."

"A black guy walks into a bar, with a parrot on his shoulder The bartender looks at him and says, ""That thing is really cool! Where did you get it?"" The parrot replies, ""Detroit"""

"How attractive are skeletons? They're drop dead gorgeous!"

"What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? About half way"

"If C3PO was made of glass... That would make him a see-through-PO!"