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Joke of the Day

"Anesthesiologists are so boring. They put me to sleep."

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"How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? Staple a piece of bread on the ceiling"
"How did the little boy save the catholic priest's life? He found a lump on his testicle."
"Q: What goes ""krab krab krab""? - A: A dog barking in a mirror."
"My wife caught me crossdressing.. So I packed her things and left."
"I'm gonna be in trouble when my kids are older and realize how much of my parenting advice is just Kenny Rogers lyrics."
"A wife in big doses is poison, in small doses medicine."
"This guy was all like ""I think you've had enough beers for one night."" Then I'm all ""Fuck you, fridge. Appliances can't even talk."""
"If William Shatner and Jason David Frank is in the same scene together... Who gets the close up?"
"If someone is bothering you with unneccessary calls to your cell number, post their number on eBay with the ad ""iPhone 5S for $1 only"""