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Joke of the Day

"I asked my local store why they don't round the 99 cent price tags to a dollar They said that there's no cents in the change"

"What's the difference between a pair of shoes and a ginger girl? You try your best to keep your shoes from getting wet when you go to town."

"I like to dump Skittles in the toilet and then flush it 'cuz it looks like a little tiny NASCAR race."

"What is the difference between arguing with a knife and arguing with your girlfriend? The knife has a point."

"I killed all the knights in the Iron Keep, except one, He was Allone"

"How do you know an Asian broke into your home? The computer's upgraded, the cat is missing and they're still trying to back the fuck outta the driveway."

"I like my men like I like my coffee... Nowhere near my vagina. A little lesbian humor....I'm not gay I just couldn't resist....too good :)"

"What did one orphan say to the other? Robin, Get the batmobile!"

"Yelling at a dog to stop barking doesn't work. The dog probably just thinks, Awesome, now we're both barking"

"Q. What do you call a blonde who dies her hair brown? A. Artificial intelligence."