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Joke of the Day

"Harry Potter was on last night, i decided to click on the subtitles so i could watch the movie and read the book at the same time"

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"If there isn't a Chinese millionaire that's changed their name to Cha Ching, then I don't see the point of money."
"So I looked up Jewish porn the other day... But all I found was ash to mouth."
"The Mens Rights subreddit did a poll to show how diverses their users are. They are 80% Single, white, 18-24, american males. HAHAHAHAHAHA"
"I like having fun with strangers in elevators by slowly moving my finger towards the emergency stop button while maintaining eye contact."
"[doctors exam] ""I'm feeling a lump here. Here's another. You have several lumps."" -uh oh, what does that mean doc? ""it means you're fat"""
"What do you call a hatred for large plants? Bigotree"
"Last night, during sex, I suddenly stopped and didn't move... She was like, ""What the hell are you doing!?"" And I was like, ""Hush baby, I saw this on PornHub....it's called 'buffering'."""
"*peeks under bathroom stall* How's the wifi signal in there?"
"What do Kim Jong-un and a penis shaped potato have in common? One is a dictator, the other is a dick-tater."