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Joke of the Day

"Are we dangerous? ""Yes"" replied mother earth."

"My crazy great Grandma My Great Grandma is 104, and she said to me: ""If the good die young, I MUST BE TERRIBLE"""

"Teacher: Tommy Russell you're late again. Tommy: Sorry sir. It's my bus - it's always coming late. Teacher: Well if it's late again tomorrow catch an earlier one."

"I have decided to write all of my jokes in capitals from now on... This one was written in Tokyo."

"What do you call a gay assassin? Ass ass in"

"If all the Domino's employees in the world held hands, you'd have to make your own pizza."

"I want to apologize to the person who followed me at 2:21am and unfollowed me by 6:45am. It was a wild ride, and I will miss you."

"What's the difference between a woman and a nun in a bath? One has a soul full of hope and the other has a hole full of soap."

"How to be a douche bag game-show host. Host: Another word for ""overtake""? Contestant: Pass. Host: Wrong. The correct answer would be ""pass""."

"*cocks gun* Me: ""Go ahead."" Horse: ""Just be cool, man."" Me: ""DRINK."" Horse: ""No problem. It's just a stupid expression."""