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Joke of the Day

"There used to be a superhero that could turn into furniture and wore a crown... He was sofa king cool."

"Guys, you CAN catch AIDS from a toilet seat! If you sit down before the other guy gets up."

"What do you call a beast made entirely from egg whites? A Meringue-u-tang!!! Note: I know it's spelled Orangutan. :P"

"So anyone know how much a Polar Bear weighs? About enough to break the ice..........."

"What 8 letter phrase means a healthy scratch? Tim Tebow"

"In the recent news of Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds both passing away... ...Keith Richards, the guitarist for the Rolling Stones, has confirmed to still be alive."

"I have this reoccurring nightmare called a job."

"For just 2 quarters a day, you can send 2 quarters a day to African children. African children love collecting quarters."

"What did one beef patty say to the other beef patty? Will you be my grill friend?"

"[lumberjack interview] BOSS: I'm gonna ""axe"" you a few questions. Haha do you get it? ME: Yeah I ""saw"" that coming BOSS: Ooo welcome aboard!"