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Joke of the Day

"So, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs walk into a bar... and I got sued for millions because I used both of their names in the same sentence."

"If you have 100$, and your girlfriend has 100$. Your girlfriend has 200$"

"""I stalk people you've probably never heard of"" -hipster stalker"

"Women are like a swimming pool... considering the money you spent on it and the time you spend in it"

"What's Mario's favourite clothing? Denim denim denim"

"What did one reddit user say to the other? (Punch line in comments)"

"Why is is called Holy Water ? Cause Holy God does it feel good when I use it to wash that alter boy's blood of my dick."

"Why is the media making such a big deal about the olympic swimmer's period? It's a perfectly normal female body function that, according to my wife, occurs 2-3 times per month."

"Buying my parents' house. Soon, like so many of the 'ladies' here... I too will be a middle aged man tweeting from his mom's basement."

"The best person to get thrown in jail with would have to be the Kool-Aid Man."