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Joke of the Day
"You are not as bad as people say, you are much, much worse."
Next Joke
"wow. chess is like a whole different game when you play it with your clothes on. was it always like that, grandpa? cause I don't like it."
"Husband: ""Lost my keys again."" Wife: ""It's in your Jeans."" Husband: ""Come on, Why do you have to Drag my family into this!"""
"What's David Cameron's favourite Shakespeare play? Hamlet."
"I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life ...if I die next Tuesday."
"My friends said I looked kinda like Hitler from the side I'm laterally Hitler"
"Next time during church, stand up and ask your pastor ""Have you ever turned down heroin?"" Both Yes and No are equally entertaining answers."
"I blame 2 of my 3 DUIs on Jesus because I specifically told him to take the wheel"
"What's the difference between Limburger cheese and my friend Ted? One is white and stinks, and the other is cheese. (As told to me by the UPS guy)"
"""As a student the most comforting words you'll ever hear are "" I haven't started either"""