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Joke of the Day

"Hurricanes are like a divorce in West Virginia There's lots of yelling and screaming, and somebody looses a trailer. -joke from my chem teacher today"

"Harry Potter jokes Give us your best Harry Potter joke. I'll start. What did Ron Weasley do the first time he saw Hermione naked? He whipped out his wand and yelled, ""***Shtupify***!""."

"I'll never forget the words of my late Grandfather... ""Sorry I'm late."""

"I hate ""save the date"" engagement cards. After divorce you should have to send out ""hey forget about that one date 6 months ago"" cards"

"What dog would you want on your American football team? A golden receiver!"

"Tonight I'll be teaching a poetry class for prison inmates called ""Prose & Cons""."

"If you fall, I'll be there. Love, The floor."

"#wecanlandonacometbutwecant let a comet land on us. - Yakov Smirnoff"

"I sleep like a baby at night, rarely and with short bursts of crying and pooping, sometimes both"

"I like the lack of controversy over the Olympic men's figure skating ""No Need to Ask, We'll Tell!"" policy."