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Joke of the Day

"No Calls ? I Understand . No Text ? I Understand , But When You See Me With Someone Else Please Understand ."

"There are 10 kinds of people in this world... ...those who understand binary and those who don't"

"I sneezed while pissing and almost pissed everywhere I think I have PEE-T-S-D now :( That was scary"

"I tried to hang myself with a bungee chord. I kept almost dying"

"So I put a bucket of water over the door a few days ago, and my victim remarked that it wasn't very original. Eh, maybe I was the fool."

"Today's life lesson: ""I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing them off is a piece of cake."""

"Nice try, nine out of the ten days in a 10-day forecast."

"*eats everything*"

"i talk to dumb ppl the same way i talk to a puppy... ""who's blocking the exit?? WHO? who's blockin' the way!?! YOU are! yes you are!!!"""

"It's all fun and games until someone cuts their eye Then it's humourous"