98499

Joke of the Day

"My penis used to be in the Guinness Book of World Records. Then I got kicked out of the library."

"TIL that it is difficult to be a good person as there is only so small a distance between an asshole and a pussy."

"How did Gertie Gorilla make the 'Playboy' Calendar? She was 'Miss Ape-ril!'"

"What's worse than getting raped by Jack the Ripper? Getting fingered by Captain Hook."

"Thanks for a lovely evening, I had a great time. Sure, I'll come in for a coffee. You have a lovely apartmeMY GOD that is a lot of Swastikas"

"What's Whitney Houstons's favourite type of co-ordination? HAND-EEEEEYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEE"

"Bill Clinton was surprised to find his old sandwich maker is ahead 12 points in the polls."

"I try to buy American, but I just can't find a good domestic finger trap."

"What is Jack the Rippers favorite restaurant? Chick Fillet"

"What do you call an asian golddigger? Cha Ching"