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Joke of the Day

"Why do feminists hate Medusa? She's always objectifying people."

"It's so hot outside, I bet Jehovah's Witnesses are going to start telemarketing."

"If you see a toilet in your dream, do not use it. It's a trap."

"Moist people aren't offended by the occasional typo."

"Why did the football player laugh when he broke his arm? Because it was humerus."

"Why are fat people always possessed by the devil? They never exorcise."

"I require three things in a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid."

"A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns... But then I realised toucan play at that game."

"Somebody finally complimented me on my parking today! I got a note on my windshield that said ""Parking Fine""."

"Real men don't need guns. One time I beat a burglar to death with a sleeve of Ritz crackers and used the crumblings for a casserole crust."