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Joke of the Day

"What is Sean Connery's favorite dish? A seizure salad."

"Have you heard about those guys at ISIS? They're on fire!"

"What do you call a flying skunk? A smellicopter!"

"They say that blondes are dumb, but I've gotten a brunette to marry me too."

"What does Harry Potter say after he purchases slaves? I expect to Potter-own 'em."

"Some chick told me to get lost so I bought every season on DVD."

"What do you call a pessimistic Mexican? A Mexican't"

"Why did the skeleton not attend prom? He had no body to go with."

"LOSER BOOTY CALL... APARTMENT Wow, you have your own apartment? Yeah, it's probably nicer than my room at the Y."

"Instead of a sock on your door, hang a doughnut. Not only is Doughnut Disturb hilarious, you provide a snack for your now homeless roommate."